


Your name is BREE and it is your BIRTHDAY

by niosism



Category: Hiveswap, Homestuck
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-22
Updated: 2020-09-22
Packaged: 2021-03-07 19:14:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,584
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26592739
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/niosism/pseuds/niosism
Summary: Some time between watching classic animes and eating grubbcake (which tastes better than you expected), you think, you never want to go back to earth, even if this is one bitch of an Alternia.
Relationships: Mallek Adalov/MS Paint Adventures Reader, Mallek Adalov/Original Character(s), Mallek Adalov/Reader, Polypa Goezee & Tegiri Kalbur, Polypa Goezee/MS Paint Adventures Reader, Polypa Goezee/Tegiri Kalbur, Tegiri Kalbur/MS Paint Adventures Reader
Kudos: 14





	Your name is BREE and it is your BIRTHDAY

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Maybl00d](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maybl00d/gifts).



> I wrote this for my friend Bree (@/Maybl00d)'s birthday and she told me to post it here!

Your name is BREE and it is your BIRTHDAY.

You sit on a uniquely-styled, not-so-generic couch. It is nothing fancy, but the material is stiff, like bamboo (she thinks it might be considering where she is rn). This place is wack. Seriously, what anime weeb has the time and energy to build their entire house to look like a fictional Japanese character’s own? Apparently this guy. I mean, okay, he’s technically an alien so it doesn’t count. Maybe aliens have higher tenacity or whatever the fuck. You would never thought TEGIRI KALBUR of all people would do such a thing when he could be watching anime instead though. You ask him if he built his own hive.

TEGIRI: As is the way of things around here.  
TEGIRI: Don’t /ook so surprised, we a// do this or we wou/dn’t have hives.  
TEGIRI: It is imperative for the surviva/ of our species.

Tegiri messes with the remote control of his living room’s massive TV screen, clicking from channel to channel insistently.

TEGIRI: There seems to be nothing but rotten grubbread this time around.  
TEGIRI: What a terrib/e waste of a trip.  
BREE: Oh, that’s okay. We can do something else, right?

You try to keep yourself stable. Okay, you think, that sucks. You were hoping some lighthearted animes could cheer you up from having had a bit of an argument with your Matesprit the day before. You feel really bad about that, considering everything that has been, or will go on soon in regards to him. Fuck, you wish you could control fate sometimes. 

TEGIRI: I suppose.  
TEGIRI: I was rea//y /ooking forward to this though.  
TEGIRI: My new a/ien friend and I were going to watch on/y the BEST and most HIGH QUA/ITY content A/ternia has to offer.  
TEGIRI: I was going to show you how rich and vibrant our cu/ture rea//y is, but I FAI/ED!

You reassure him that he hasn’t failed anything and try not to chuckle at his theatrics. He is rather dramatic, and it is kind of charming, even if it can also be patronizing and pedantic at times. Weeb.

TEGIRI: Po/ypa was supposed to come as we//.

Oh, now you’re proper sad. See, this is what having expectations does to you, and also Tegiri, you guess. Troll’s taking his time wiping off his glasses now. You hope he didn’t wet them with TEARS.

BREE: She might still come, it’s still early.  
BREE: Are you okay?  
TEGIRI: Yes, of course!  
TEGIRI: I am 100% not shuddering in the reminiscing of my /one/y state of being even when I have a perfect/y good friend at my side.  
TEGIRI: That is simp/y RIDICU/OUS!

You’re not quite sure you buy that claim. Sounds awfully like an excuse to you. 

TEGIRI: A/though I guess you have a point.  
TEGIRI: Po/ypa does tend to be /ate to these things.  
TEGIRI: Perhaps I shou/d teach her a /esson in being on time because that is important in both arts of FRIENDSHIP and COMBAT.

Um, you start to formulate in your human brain, maybe it’d be good to let her know instead of acting entitled, especially with someone less privileged than you.

BREE: You could let her know it upsets you.  
BREE: Nicely.  
TEGIRI: A death wish!!  
BREE: Is it though?

Tegiri considers your challenging of his personal belief like it is something of immense importance like life or death.

TEGIRI: Maybe NOT.  
BREE: Yeah lol. 

Tegiri unsheathes his sword and makes a dramatic display of sword fighting between friends. It’s what they do in anime, you’ve come to know.

TEGIRI: I wi// give her a taste of JUSTICE.

You can’t hold in your laugh this time. You’re not making fun of him, you swear. He’s just a funny guy! You don’t take him seriously most of the time, which maybe is something you should do as a friend but cmon, fighting Polypa to the death just because she is late sometimes? That’s too cartoony.

Your palmhusk starts buzzing. You bring it up to see the caller ID and your heart skips a beat. Sweet troll Jegus.

BREE: Hello...  
MALLEK: hey;

There is an awkward pause.

MALLEK: sorry about yesterday;  
MALLEK: i mean; i kinda fuckin deserved it anyway;  
MALLEK: for the way i acted;  
MALLEK: i was under a lot of stress and i shouldn’t have taken it out on you; so;  
MALLEK: sorry;

His words sound genuine, but his delivery is shaky, not like he is having a hard time apologizing, but just because he probably feels shitty about it.

You don’t have the emotional capacity to describe your response in detail, so let’s just say that you break down right there in Tegiri’s well-organized but dusty anime hive and leave the poor dude waving his sword behind you to suddenly recoil and intake a sharp breath. His mind goes, Must... resist... the urge to comfort...Which is slightly strange at first but then we remember that Tegiri is an otaku and otakus don’t know how to socially interact with anybody.

You do a passable job of holding in your tears, but your brain is filled with EMOTIONS. You take a pause and then remember you’re talking to Mallek on the palmhusk, not texting, and that you have to reply soon before he asks if you’re still on the line.

You say that it’s fine and you were just worried he would be upset about YOU because you’ve got no hard feelings about it at all. You realized soon after the incident that you care a lot more about him than any stupid thoughtless words thrown around that don’t mean anything. You end by saying you’re sorry too and that you hope you can see him again soon.

MALLEK: fuck dude what was all that for;  
MALLEK: you dont have to open your floodgates for me; i gotchu;  
MALLEK: that = wow;  
MALLEK: youre leaving me to eat my shame here;  
MALLEK: it = nice of you to say;  
MALLEK: fr i;  
MALLEK: in the end im glad youre with me;  
MALLEK: im not going to go anywhere if i can help it;  
MALLEK: fuck outer space i will dig myself into the ground;  
MALLEK: for you;

You heave a sigh of relief and tell him you’ll get through this together. You can tell he smiles through the phone because of the tone of his voice. God, you love this cerulean IT fucker.

MALLEK: anyway; thanks;  
MALLEK: for sticking by me and everything else;  
MALLEK: and;  
MALLEK: happy wrig-;  
MALLEK: uh;  
MALLEK: birthday?

You tell him, of course, you’re glad he’s with you too, and you’re so happy he called to wish you a happy birthday! You say that it’s okay for him to call it a wriggling day because you are an alien in HIS society, so you might as well blend right in. This is a mutual feelings jam you’re having here, dam. You hope Tegiri isn’t being too nosy since you heard him stop swinging his blade around midway through this convo. 

Mallek tells you to come by his place tomorrow or even later today (and that he promises it won’t be such a mess this time) before saying “i love you” and hanging up.

Are you crying at this point? You can’t tell. Tegiri comes back to sit next to you again and decides trying to be comforting is no longer needed because you may have tears in your eyes but your face seems happy enough.

TEGIRI: That was the one you wou/d go to the ends of A/ternia for just /ike tro// Naruto Uzumaki did for tro// Sasuke Uchiha wasn’t it??  
TEGIRI: The one your pusher BEATS for!

Oh, god. You’re so embarrassed but also incredibly amused at the same time. You tell Tegiri that was your Matesprit.

TEGIRI: Yes, that is exact/y what I said.  
TEGIRI: I wish I had someone my b/oodpusher throbbed for as we//.  
TEGIRI: Maybe then I wou/dn’t fee/ so err-  
TEGIRI: Nevermind that!

Just as you are about to tell Tegiri that it is okay if he wants to talk to you about some loneliness problems he’s been having, there is a knock on the door.

TEGIRI: Cou/d it BE??

Tegiri literally runs to the door and you catch the biggest grin on his face. Boy, you sure hope it is whoever he thinks it is. You think you know who he is thinking of.

POLYPA: Hey tegs * did you miss me? *|

Fuck yeah, he did, you think to yourself, and so did you! Tegiri steels his face once he is in front of Polypa, however, probably because he is self-conscious of showing just how happy he is she is finally here.

TEGIRI: You are /ate again!  
POLYPA: I’ve already told you tegs * being an assassin takes some patience *|

You smile at their playful banter and greet Polypa yourself. She pats you gently on the cheek, like you had when you tried to calm her down once upon a time. It has become a habit of you two since then, and it is only fitting. You are Moirails after all.

You can finally get this party started!

Some time between watching classic animes and eating grubbcake (which tastes better than you expected), you think, you never want to go back to earth, even if this is one bitch of an Alternia.

**Author's Note:**

> Yes, Tegiri has a crush on Polypa.


End file.
